Traumas and Abuse
I have many easy, respectful and surprisingly comfortable ways to defuse traumas, PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) flashbacks and resolve unpleasant emotions and traumatic memories. Many people find they feel they can trust me in order to deal with accidents, fires and injuries, wartime or civil incidents, as well as attacks, rape, physical abuse, emotional abuse, child abuse, sexual abuse and any other forms of trauma or abuse.
I do not use the usual forms of ‘critical incident debriefing’ as research suggests that it sometimes makes things worse. I also avoid regression, where the therapist tries to get the person reliving the situation (either through hypnosis or just by asking the client to ‘face the emotions’). This is completely unnecessary, upsets the client and makes it more difficult to move on.
Instead, the ways I work avoid reliving any of the memories or going over them in any detail. I use a natural technique called disassociation to help your mind to disconnect from any discomfort and help it to review the situation as if it is looking at it from outside, from a good safe distance. This helps you to stay comfortable and helps your mind to be clear and resourceful. You do not have to tell me any intimate or intricate details of what happened, I only need enough detail to let me know what to do for you.
Our minds tend to hang on to past memories in order to learn from them. Once you have comfortably learned what you need from the past, you will automatically avoid situations or learn how to deal with them in the future. Your mind will then settle down and leave the past behind.
One thing we can often learn from the past is that we were young and vulnerable then and often did not understand what was going on at the time. We can forgive ourselves for our mistakes, especially when we realise that we were innocent or that we made mistakes that were understandable for someone of that age. We can especially release ourselves from any guilt that others tried to make us feel, particularly when they were the instigators.
Another thing we can learn, is how to trust our own judgement again. Many people who have been through difficult situations, either just did not see it coming or had an intuition that something was wrong, but did not know how to get out of the situation or talked themselves out of acting on that intuition. With the wisdom of hindsight, we can recognise the signs of when something is wrong and know what to do to avoid it in future. This is one of the main foundations of self confidence.
Once we have defused the situations from the past, I can then coach you in handling everyday situations and any present day problems, far more happily and easily. Many people are surprised at how easily they can deal with things that used to seem such a problem. You can see a bit more of what I can do for you at this stage in the sections on Confidence, Assertiveness, Self esteem and Communication skills.